We have all grown up where we are taught not to be afraid, and try to overcome our fear. But to me, we are often afraid of failing merely because we don’t want to be embarrassed. For example, if you miss a project deadline, you are not afraid that you will get fired. It usually takes a few failures (and consistent failures) to get you fired. There are many examples like this where we aren’t afraid because there will be an immediate and terrible consequence to it. Most failures in my opinion are associated with embarrassment. You will be embarrassed in front of your company, your colleague, your team, your classmates, your friends or even your family.
The fear of embarrassment however could be a good thing. I don’t want to embarrass myself and that’s why I will make a sincere effort to succeed. This is exactly how it works for me.
The Announcement
I am trying to create that fear or feeling of embarrassment today by letting all my friends, family and colleagues know that I am running a marathon on the 19th of November. I am doing this so that when I am running and am feeling exhausted, tired and ready to give up somewhere between 20 and 26 miles, I will think of all those people who would be disappointed in me if I didn’t cross the line. Even if they will still appreciate me for giving it a try (I am lucky to have supportive friends), I will be embarrassed beyond imagination that I let myself down. So I am trying to set myself up for success by writing this blog.
The Big Number: 50
I am turning 50 this year and this is going to be an amazing birthday gift for me to be able to cross the Philadelphia Marathon finish line. I so desperately wanted to run a marathon “on my birthday” but couldn’t find one close by. But a day after is going to feel just as good! Although, I am definitely envisioning a picture perfect moment of my family handing me the running bib on my birthday when I go to collect it before the race day. I am so excited that my family is traveling with me to cheer me up and support me. However, this wasn’t how they had wanted to celebrate my 50th birthday. My wife had been planning to do something big for quite some time (still kept a secret from me) but when she and my kids found out that running a marathon on my 50th is what would make me truly happy, they gave in on their plans. This is the best birthday gift, I could have imagined. Oh, and she did start making me feel special from 50 days before my 50th birthday. That’s 50 days of pampering! Lucky me!!
High confidence level
This being my 4th marathon, I am psychologically feeling pretty good. As part of this marathon training, I have done a few of 13 miles, a 16 miles and just wrapped up my last long training run of 20 miles this past weekend. I would have wanted to start training a few weeks early but I am still feeling confident. But there is always that unknown factor, isn’t it? What if it rains that day (I cried the day before my first marathon when I realized I was going to be running in rain)? What if I get cramps severe enough that I can’t run at all (I would have given up my second marathon because of cramps if my buddy Vini hadn’t started running with me and pushed me to the finish line)? What if I just can’t get past the wall that most runners face around 20? Also, this is my first marathon where I am on my own. My running buddy Vini won’t be running with me this time (hint hint he just ran one of the 3 majors and running another major soon)!
You can help
I would like you to remind me that you will be waiting for me to cross that line on the 19th. I would like you to build that pressure on me so that I re-think 100 times before I give up and save myself from embarrassment. Please reach out to me if you want to know how else can you help. No fundraising this time (phew!). The help will be all emotional and virtual and won’t need any commitment :-)
My goal for this marathon
The goal is still the same as the first marathon i.e. to finish the race but finish it better than my last race. I ran my last marathon without stopping or walking and would like to do the same this time. My ambitious goal is 4:20 but as long as it under 4:33, I won’t be disappointed, because every PR is an accomplishment. Again, I am telling you this goal because I want to know that I have told you about this and if I don’t get there, I will be embarrassed :-)
Wish me luck please! I do need it.
